—When you make the decisions, you can’t blame someone else for your situation. —You get practice and feedback(in your results), so you start to make better decisions. —Other people often just want someone to make a decision so they don’t have to. —If they don’t like your decision, they can always speak up. —If you have a preference and nobody else cares, then it’s good you spoke up. —People have more respect for those who have an opinion. —The people around you start to become more likely to speak up about their own desires, so you don’t have to waste a bunch of time trying to guess what they want. —It’s more confident. —Choosing is leading. People who lead are seen as leaders (duh). —Disagreements aren’t bad unless you turn them into arguments; you get to practice communicating in disagreement without turning it into an argument. When I was around 29 years old, I realized that I was constantly deferring to the people around me. I decided to start making my own decisions, and I felt like my life made a pretty sudden shift. There are still many situations where I will let other people take the lead, and obviously I don’t always have the right to make a decision for a group, but when I have the right to put in my opinion, I’ll generally speak up even if I don’t feel very strongly about it. I believe that you teach people how much respect to give you. Act like someone who’s just along for the ride, and you’ll be taken for a ride. Act like the driver, and often you get to choose the course.
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Nick is a teacher, writer, and amateur adventurer. Archives
June 2020
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